Throwing Darts
Credit for the idea of "throwing darts" goes to 10X National Champion Coach Jim Miller, who I had the privilege of hearing speak this past week at the NWCA FCA Leadership Academy.
No matter what you do in life there is always tremendous value in having the ability to inspire belief in others. In order for anyone to achieve something great, they much first believe that they can do it. Once someone starts to believe that they can achieve something, there is a switch that flips. As a coach I can see it in my athletes. I can almost feel it radiating off of them. It drives them to put in the extra work and to sacrifice in order to achieve their goals. The opposite is also true, when someone doesn't believe in themselves, they are not willing to put in the extra work and sacrifice, because they do not believe it will be worth it.
So, how does one inspire others to believe in themselves? There are many ways, but "throwing darts" is one of the best ways. Think of throwing darts at a dart board. You might throw fifty darts and only get one bull's-eye. But if you throw a hundred darts, you will likely get more than one bull's-eye. And if you keep practicing, the number of bull's-eyes you hit in relation to the number of darts you throw will continue to increase. That is the way it is when you throw darts at people. But instead of throwing darts, you are throwing compliments. So when I see one of my wrestlers hit a nice move in practice, a dart would be, "Man! That double leg you hit today was sweet!" Or if a wrestler comes into the office during the day I might say something like "That weight lifting program must be working for you, cause you are looking huge!"
Just one or two darts like this might not make a huge impact on an athlete, but after an athlete hears these things over and over and over and over again, it eventually starts to sink in. And one or two of them will hit the "bull's-eye". In other words it will be exactly what that person needs to hear in order to start believing in himself. And just like real darts, the more you practice throwing these compliments the more bull's-eyes you will hit.
I was fortunate to have a Coach in college who was excellent at throwing darts. I remember one time in particular when he threw a dart that was a perfect bull's-eye. It was after practice one day, I believe during my sophomore year, when Coach Brunk challenged me to a seven minute match. I don't remember what happened in the match, I just remember losing by a narrow margin and feeling like I was getting closer to where I wanted to be, but wasn't there yet. Then Coach Brunk said something to me that I will never forget. Feeling tired after the match, having pretty well spent himself beating me, he looked at me and said "You are going to be an All-American".
Up to that point in my wrestling career, there was part of me that thought I could be an All-American, but I didn't really believe it deep down in my soul. When he said that however, something changed inside of me. I knew he truly believed what he was saying. A dart like that is like mental jet fuel for an athlete. At least it was for me. From that day forward, I started to truly believe that I would be and could be an All-American, and maybe even a National Champion.
The Bible even talks about throwing darts in Proverbs 16:24, which says "Kind words are like honey - Sweet to the soul and healthy for the body." Throwing darts at people is so powerful, that it can even bring physical health to people! That's awesome! It's crazy to me that anyone would not want to be a person who throws darts.
Think about the people in your life that inspire you. The people who always make you feel like you can accomplish anything after you have a conversation with them. These people are constantly throwing darts. Whether it's a compliment about your smile, your attitude, your abilities, or just the way you carry yourself. The way they talk doesn't happen by accident. They know exactly what they are doing and they continue doing it because it breathes life into everyone around them.
If we throw darts at the people in our life, over time we will become one of those people who breathes life into others. And the side effect is, when you become this person, people will want to be around you and they will want to help you achieve your goals. They might not even know why, but they will be drawn to you and whatever you are working towards in life will come more easily. People that are the opposite of a dart thrower. The negative people that are always criticizing. You know the people I am talking about. They will never achieve true success. They might go far in life in some respect, but there will always be a trail of bodies in their wake. A life giving person will always be able to look back in life and see all the people who have helped them along the way and who are still there to support them. I want to be that person. And one way to start is by throwing darts.
No matter what you do in life there is always tremendous value in having the ability to inspire belief in others. In order for anyone to achieve something great, they much first believe that they can do it. Once someone starts to believe that they can achieve something, there is a switch that flips. As a coach I can see it in my athletes. I can almost feel it radiating off of them. It drives them to put in the extra work and to sacrifice in order to achieve their goals. The opposite is also true, when someone doesn't believe in themselves, they are not willing to put in the extra work and sacrifice, because they do not believe it will be worth it.
So, how does one inspire others to believe in themselves? There are many ways, but "throwing darts" is one of the best ways. Think of throwing darts at a dart board. You might throw fifty darts and only get one bull's-eye. But if you throw a hundred darts, you will likely get more than one bull's-eye. And if you keep practicing, the number of bull's-eyes you hit in relation to the number of darts you throw will continue to increase. That is the way it is when you throw darts at people. But instead of throwing darts, you are throwing compliments. So when I see one of my wrestlers hit a nice move in practice, a dart would be, "Man! That double leg you hit today was sweet!" Or if a wrestler comes into the office during the day I might say something like "That weight lifting program must be working for you, cause you are looking huge!"
Just one or two darts like this might not make a huge impact on an athlete, but after an athlete hears these things over and over and over and over again, it eventually starts to sink in. And one or two of them will hit the "bull's-eye". In other words it will be exactly what that person needs to hear in order to start believing in himself. And just like real darts, the more you practice throwing these compliments the more bull's-eyes you will hit.
I was fortunate to have a Coach in college who was excellent at throwing darts. I remember one time in particular when he threw a dart that was a perfect bull's-eye. It was after practice one day, I believe during my sophomore year, when Coach Brunk challenged me to a seven minute match. I don't remember what happened in the match, I just remember losing by a narrow margin and feeling like I was getting closer to where I wanted to be, but wasn't there yet. Then Coach Brunk said something to me that I will never forget. Feeling tired after the match, having pretty well spent himself beating me, he looked at me and said "You are going to be an All-American".
Up to that point in my wrestling career, there was part of me that thought I could be an All-American, but I didn't really believe it deep down in my soul. When he said that however, something changed inside of me. I knew he truly believed what he was saying. A dart like that is like mental jet fuel for an athlete. At least it was for me. From that day forward, I started to truly believe that I would be and could be an All-American, and maybe even a National Champion.
The Bible even talks about throwing darts in Proverbs 16:24, which says "Kind words are like honey - Sweet to the soul and healthy for the body." Throwing darts at people is so powerful, that it can even bring physical health to people! That's awesome! It's crazy to me that anyone would not want to be a person who throws darts.
Think about the people in your life that inspire you. The people who always make you feel like you can accomplish anything after you have a conversation with them. These people are constantly throwing darts. Whether it's a compliment about your smile, your attitude, your abilities, or just the way you carry yourself. The way they talk doesn't happen by accident. They know exactly what they are doing and they continue doing it because it breathes life into everyone around them.
If we throw darts at the people in our life, over time we will become one of those people who breathes life into others. And the side effect is, when you become this person, people will want to be around you and they will want to help you achieve your goals. They might not even know why, but they will be drawn to you and whatever you are working towards in life will come more easily. People that are the opposite of a dart thrower. The negative people that are always criticizing. You know the people I am talking about. They will never achieve true success. They might go far in life in some respect, but there will always be a trail of bodies in their wake. A life giving person will always be able to look back in life and see all the people who have helped them along the way and who are still there to support them. I want to be that person. And one way to start is by throwing darts.
Bullseye brother. Sure do miss you guys
ReplyDeleteThanks Ed! We miss you guys too! We are working on planning a weekend this summer to come out to Ohio.
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