The Greatest Mental Super Power

It was a holiday tournament, two days after Christmas. I was getting ready to wrestle in the consolation semi-finals against a guy who was pretty good. They were only placing the top 4, so if I won, I would wrestle for third and if I lost I got to be done for the day. I was pretty tired from wrestling all day and I knew this tournament didn't really mean anything. So, I did what any self-respecting wrestler would do.

I went out there and I made it look good.

I tried pretty hard, but probably not as hard as I possibly could. I wanted to win, but I also wanted to take a shower and relax the rest of the day.

Since this guy was pretty good, I don't think anyone questioned my effort, but I knew I didn't give it everything I had. After losing the match there was a sense of relief that I was done for the day and I got to sit in the stands and watch my teammates finish out the day.

But that sense of relief was quickly followed by a sense of "Wow Matthew, you are such a tool!" You sand bagged because you wanted to shower up and sit in the stands??? Where is your heart? Your pride? Your competitive drive?

Looking back on it now, I can see much more clearly why I sand bagged in that match that day. It's real simple.

I wasn't grateful for the opportunity to wrestle.

I was focused on all the negative things about that day. Like the fact that I would have probably rather been home relaxing and I was tired and the match "really didn't matter". As opposed to the positive things. Like the fact that I had the amazing ability to use my body to wrestle and that I got to do two of my favorite things in the world in the same week... Christmas and wrestling. I should have been ECSTATIC that I got to wrestle in that consi-semis match with the opportunity to wrestle again for third place!

But I wasn't.

I lost that day because of a lack of gratitude.

There are plenty of studies on gratitude and how grateful people are happier, healthier, and live longer. But there are some other benefits to being grateful when it comes to your performance in a sport or in any other area of your life.

1. When you are grateful, you leave it all on the line

In other words, you give it everything you have. When you are thankful for the opportunity to do something instead begrudged it is impossible to sand bag. Your brain won't let you.

You've probably worked with someone who does just enough work not to get fired. That person will never get ahead, because they are not grateful for their job. They are bitter that they don't have a better job, but they are unwilling to give more effort than required in order to get there.

If I had been completely pumped that I had the opportunity to wrestle in that match that day, I probably would have won, or at least wrestled better. And best of all, I would have had the satisfaction of knowing I gave it everything I had.

2. When you are grateful, there is no pressure to perform

If you know an ungrateful person, you probably know someone who is always stressed. Always worrying what other people think. Or worried about meeting other people's expectations. All this worrying and focusing on things outside of their control puts immense pressure on them to perform.

This stress and worry that people have is rooted in a lack of gratitude.

Going into that consi-semis match, one of my thoughts was about what other people would think if I lost. That thought added to my poor performance, because it wasn't just me out there having fun. It was me with the pressure of what my coach and teammates would think of me depending on the outcome.

If I had been more grateful, that match would have been a win-win scenario. I would either wrestle that match, have fun and score more points than my opponent or wrestle that match, have fun and score less points than my opponent. Either way I have fun and I get to wrestle!

3. When you are grateful, you are a better steward 

You ever give someone a gift and it's either lost or broken within a week? It's pretty obvious that the recipient of your gift wasn't too grateful right?

On the other hand, sometimes you can give someone a gift and even if it's not the exact gift they wanted they take great care of that gift and make the most of it. For me that is my leather boots that my wife got for me. I make good use of those boots and I even had the soles fixed when they started to fall off, because I am grateful for them and I like them.

The same thing is true of people that are grateful for their God-given gifts. I was given the gift of being able to wrestle. A gift that I could very easily want to trade for the gift of being able to play golf or something else that makes more money. But God decided to give me the ability to wrestle.

If I had been more grateful for my gift of the ability to wrestle that day, I would have done everything I could to be a good steward of that gift and my attitude and effort would have shown that.

Grateful people take care of and make the most of the gifts they are given. That is the greatest mental super power.